things i have been learning over the past several days
-i am a sinful person.
-G-d (and others, albeit imperfectly) still love me despite it. i am very grateful for it.
-fasting from music is much harder sometimes than fasting for food because the hunger never really numbs down.
-i want to bring penance with those i've hurt deeply. if you are one of those people, i am very very sorry. i love you, and i hope you love me too.
-love, when done properly, will ruin both your life and quite possible others- but it's beautiful and humbling once you let go.
-facebook status updates are one of G-d's most powerful tools in my life at this very second[1]
-hand-rolling cigarettes (american spirit, if you're wondering) is for some reason much easier for me if i'm doing a bunch at one time. yay cigarette case
-worrying is fruitless as the truth and future are usually much less worse than what the dark and twisted heart that worrying brings has come up with
-this list is getting too wordy
-loving is hard on oneself, but holding grudges or malice is far harder on oneself
that's all for now.
i love you all.
[1] "Love has no meaning if it isn't shared. Love has to be put into action. You have to love without expectation, to do something for love itself, not for what you may receive. If you expect something in return, then it isn't love, because true love is loving without conditions and expectations" - Mother Teresa (via brandt russo)
"You are cordially invited to be Courageous and Vulnerable." (via benjamin brown)
-G-d (and others, albeit imperfectly) still love me despite it. i am very grateful for it.
-fasting from music is much harder sometimes than fasting for food because the hunger never really numbs down.
-i want to bring penance with those i've hurt deeply. if you are one of those people, i am very very sorry. i love you, and i hope you love me too.
-love, when done properly, will ruin both your life and quite possible others- but it's beautiful and humbling once you let go.
-facebook status updates are one of G-d's most powerful tools in my life at this very second[1]
-hand-rolling cigarettes (american spirit, if you're wondering) is for some reason much easier for me if i'm doing a bunch at one time. yay cigarette case
-worrying is fruitless as the truth and future are usually much less worse than what the dark and twisted heart that worrying brings has come up with
-this list is getting too wordy
-loving is hard on oneself, but holding grudges or malice is far harder on oneself
that's all for now.
i love you all.
[1] "Love has no meaning if it isn't shared. Love has to be put into action. You have to love without expectation, to do something for love itself, not for what you may receive. If you expect something in return, then it isn't love, because true love is loving without conditions and expectations" - Mother Teresa (via brandt russo)
"You are cordially invited to be Courageous and Vulnerable." (via benjamin brown)
Comments
aww victoria! yeah, bugler
On August 1st, 2009 brent says:
aww victoria!
yeah, bugler is.. horrible. i know it's not "safe" but i smoke american spirit now- no additives whatsoever, just 100% tobacco. plus they give a portion of their profit to the native american coalitions (since they have their "sponsorship"- it's the tobacco they usually use for ceremonies since it's pure).
i mean, lemme put it this way- at least i'm shooting myself in the foot with a 9mm instead of a .45..
but yeah. i'll quit eventually, i'm sure. i'm already sick of kreteks.
yay! can't wait to see you victoriaaaa!
love the list
I mean this with sincere care for you - my 35 year old brother always rolled his own cigarettes with bugler or whatever it is. . .but he quit smoking after he had his stroke in December. Quit now before you have something like that happen! It breaks my heart to see people I care about slowly kill themselves! My dad has emphasyma! My great-uncle died in Sept. from emphasyma. Rob's grandfather died from lung cancer. mellie's step-dad died from lung cancer. I never knew my grandfather because he died of heart issues and was an avid smoker which was part of the cause. Don't bring heartache to others. You have NOT hurt me yet, but if you continue in this, it will hurt many. You're awesome man.
Now I sooooo agree with you on this list. It's really true that malice and grudgery is rough on a person. it causes one to become bitter. why would someone want to live with that? it makes me think of those old people who have permanent scowls on their faces because they held so much against others rather than forgiving their brothers and sisters and giving it up to God.
I often think about people I have most likely hurt. It's caused me to become softer in the past few months alone. I have always been a blunt person. . .but the way that it comes out I suppose doesn't express enough love and it hurts others without me meaning to at all, and sometimes when you decide to be honest with another it is going to hurt no matter how loving you try to be. ugh!
Anyway this wasn't as good of a response as my first, but it's on the same level.
see you tomorrow, friend!
+ Victoria +